Wednesday, June 23, 2010

The Old Grey Mare

I don't want to feel this way any more

I want an end to fear
and worry
and judgment
and physical pain
and lack of connection
and inadequacy
and criticism
and lack of acknowledgment

Always lacking

I am steeped in egotism
and worthlessness,
simultaneously
My world collapses
upon one morning of
absent phone messages
and lonely self-obsession
and empty e-mail accounts

I push away and fear connection
while damning the lack thereof
I desire intimacy yet follow
where no bread crumbs lead.

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